Fun with door to door salesman - UPDATED

[YellowJacket!]

Ok, I like door to door salsemen as much as I like telemarketers and today after my 7th day in a row at the hospital I decided to take a quick nap after work.  About an hour into my power nap the doorbell rings and the dogs go crazy.  Yup, its a door to door salesman and he's selling alarms (ADT).
I slide the screen down (with my dogs barking up a storm) and tell him I'm not interested but he starts to quote statistics and asks me if I have an alarm system (the sticker is on the door) so I say "Yes, I do." He asked me if I keep it armed...something I don't like to tell strangers, but I told him  yes I do, they're right hear trying to break through the door and tear your legs off.  So, the dumb a$$ tells me that dogs are no longer an effective deterrent to burgulars.  Hmmm.  I told him that they are trained to slow down any intruders long enough for me to get better aim with my Glock and I'm pretty good in the dark with two to the chest and one to the head.  He smiled and said "have a good evening".   :police: :police:

David

[kiawrench]

  i dont mind those guys sometimes, as long as they respect homeowners rights.
abuse my good graces and get loud, or push my door - or any of that crap ,and a salesman will meet exit end of my 9mm carbine - sign by the door bell explains  it all :

                    please ring for guest service
all salesmen WILL be placed in wood chipper prior to disposal .

that and the serious reference to a soviet 9mm short gets my doorway clear in seconds .

[YellowJacket!]

sign by the door bell explains  it all :

                    please ring for guest service
all salesmen WILL be placed in wood chipper prior to disposal .

that and the serious reference to a soviet 9mm short gets my doorway clear in seconds .

LOL.... I remember that sign!  :D

David

[Rick G]

We don't get many door to door, as the gate is locked most of the time. But we still get a few a holes who call on the phne at dinner time . I push "one " to talk to a real person and when they answer , I blow my train whistle in there ear . Funny thing ,when I stop their always gone ! Probably with a head ache

[h2olawyer]

Ever since Colorado instituted a no-call list (followed later by a national one), I've had only a very few sales calls.  The 'charities' and political stuff still comes through, but those are fairly rare more than about a month before an election.

There was one particularly irritating satellite TV (not Dish or DirecTV) call I'd get almost nightly - even though I was on the no call list.  I reported them every time.  Within a couple weeks, they made the Denver TV News and were fined somewnere near $5million.  The thing about calling people on the Colorado no-call list is that each number on the list that was called is a separate offense & is fined individually.  That telemarketing company filed for bankruptcy & liquidated.   ;D

Fort Collins has really strict & enforced regulations covering door to door sales.  It is nearly impossible to get a license for it here.  I haven't had one sales visit since I moved here in 1988!  The City Council scheduled a public discussion about the possibility of easing the regulations a little for some local businesses.  After the large public outcry (all against) they dropped the discussion from the schedule and things will stay as they are now.  Besides, I think they saw that having regulations that favor some types of businesses over others could be a due process problem & opened the city up to the possibility of some costly lawsuits.  There were two days between the time they announed the discussion and they dropped it.  Guess the poeple spoke!  The sales of "No Solicitors" signs here is extremely slow.

I do like how YellowJacket handled his situation.   ;D

H₂O

[firstone]

Many years ago my mother decided to scare a skunk away from the trash cans in the front yard with my fathers 38.  Not being familiar with it she shot a hole through the bottom half of the aluminum portion of the screen door.  No salesmen have show up since.

[kiawrench]

YJ  , or anyone else that has sales man issues _

  once they begin the sales pitch, stop them, and ask in a serious way-- "are you aware of study that was done at University of Texas at El Paso?" when they ask what study,, reply sort of slowly " it was a domestic violence thing,,, it only takes 3.16 seconds to shoot a man on your porch 3 times. luckily ,it takes another 4 seconds for the blood evidence to touch the floor . so there is always plenty of time to drag a dying body into the house to prove self defense"    most leave then .

[YellowJacket!]

Actually I may try an Airforce tactic.  You know how fighter pilots have flags on their planes for every enemy they shoot down?  Well, I can draw little pictures of salesmen with a red line across them and stick it next to my doorbell.  Wonder if that will work.  Hmmmm.  :D

David

[Rick G]

I'm on the national do not call list , but it has only slowed them down. How do you report them?

[vadasz1]

Rick, have you tried the Smith & Wesson approach?   8)

[h2olawyer]

I'm on the national do not call list , but it has only slowed them down. How do you report them?

I've never had to report on the national list.  You might try a google search "reporting violations of national do not call list" or similar.  For the Colorado list, there is a website.  You need to get as much info as possible about the caller - often difficult especially with those damn robocalls.  At a minimum, you need the name of the company trying to sell.

Also, caller ID id often useless as they either hide the number or even use something to change the number entirely.  I received a few robo calls on my cell phone (not on any do not call lists) from an auto extended warranty outfit.  The numbers left behind on the caller ID all belonged to various private Verizon customers all over the country.  I rarely even have the cell phone turned on - and mainly use it while travelling.  It's just an AT&T Go Phone.  Costs me $100 a year & I don't come close to using even half the minutes.  I hate being tied to a phone.  Those who know me know I can normally be reached fastest by email or by calling my home phone.  When I'm away from home (where I also work) I am often intentionally away from the phone.  Managed to survive for the first 35 years of my life without a cell phone & have found no reason to carry that intrusion with me except for my own convenience or emergency use.

H₂O

[kiawrench]

  i can see it now,, Yellow Jacket gets custom made decals of stick figure being shoved into a wood chipper-- letters underneath say "Who's Next", secind set still being printed shows two stick figures on bicycles with ties ,,, surrounded by anti aircraft ring sights !!!

[Rick G]

My cell is on the do not call list too. I got one solicitation call on it and ripped them a new one about wasting my minuets.
Believe me if I could get them in my sights , I'd use my 12 gauge! >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:(

[YellowJacket!]

According to a person that  I work with who lives in a subdivision near mine, the "salesman" was not a representative of ADT or any other secuity company, however, he was well familiar with home security systems...from the other end.  You see, he was a criminal.  His ADT badge was a fake and the signs he had were stolen from other peoples yards.  He was caught because a neighbor was suspicious and called the police...who didn't act "stupidly", rather they responded and followed up and arrested him.  He also had outstanding warrents for violent crimes.  Hmmm, seems like my dogs were in fact good judges of character.   :police:  :police:

David

[kwells]

wow...that's interesting.  This must be rampant.  After I read your initial story of the guy coming to your door asking about your security my girlfriend's mom was telling me someone came to her door asking if they had a security system.  I told her not to disclose ANYTHING about your security to anyone. A couple days later they came back and she ran them off.

Be careful about who knows what.

[kiawrench]

tired of that same old dinner time door knock?Got  salesman troubles,,, hi folks ,, millie bays here for privacy chipper --- the new way to rid your home of unwanted salesmen!

   our amazing new device just sits out in the yard, doing nothing! the secret is in the location . We have contracted quality craftsmen in third world countries to produce the new and improved privacy chipper!
true to life detailed hand painted blood spatters, a real shoe filled with a finely crafted resin "foot " .a portion of the all too common blue shirt and tan pants artistically draped from the "kid safe" chipping maul! and as our special gift , a container of stage blood, to be dabbled on your hands and shirt when salesmen dare to ring!

     right now, you can own this nearly perfect home security device for the introductory price of 129.99, plus shipping and handling!  but wait----- there's more  for only the time it takes to read this  posting, select buyers can get two chippers for the price of one ! just add the shipping for the second device ,and it is yours . be the first in your hometown to show that dinner time salesman that you really intend to toss him into a wood chipper!  this offer wont last, so call today, get that lawn jockey moved over , install a new (working when built )wood chipper today !


  CUT! ---- print--- get that into the can and off to the tv station!!

[YellowJacket!]

Oh man...that was great kia.  I just ordered one.

David

[YellowJacket!]

Ok...this is getting on my nerves and I finally called the police after scaring the crap out of a guy with my airsoft glock...not the real one.  In the 30 minute period from when I got home from work, a total of 3 people came to my door claiming to be ADT salesmen and none of them after the first one knew of the others before them. One was driving a white unmarked minivan and had another fake looking name badge and the other two had on blue shirts.  They were offering to give me either a free "security assessment" ie, case my house or, give me a free alarm system if I let them put a sign in the yard.  I told the first and second one that the subdivision prohibits soliciting and the second guy told me I was "violating his freedom of speech"!  LOL.  I saw the 3rd guy coming down the street so I called teh cops and got the airsoft gun ready.  Answered the door with the dogs going crazy and the gun in my hand.  He didn't seem too concerned until I told him that I had already called the police.
Been about 15 mins...still waiting on them.

David

[Night Vision]

are they there yet?

you should have called 911 first, told them you shot a burglar.... and hung up

then stalled the third guy..... until you heard the sirens coming up your street...

then pulled out the airglock, and shot the perp between the eyes.....

that way you could say... "yes, I shot him, what took you so long?"

eh, next time....

[YellowJacket!]

Took about an hour because I used the non-emergency line.  I hate using 911 for anything other than an emergency.  I was in the garage working on the lights when the officer arrived.  Talked a little Vision with him too.  Gave him the description And he said he would write up a report and they would increase the drivethrough's in our neighborhood for a while.  Also reported it to the HO assoc.  Turns out also that someone stole/removed the "no Soliciting" signs from our subdivisions entrance.

David